coffeepeople:

There are two types of single people 

  1. desperately wants to be in a relationship
  2. desperately wants to remain single for as long as possible 

I am both.

(via ihuntshadows)

plantkitten:

i love you im glad you exist im so happy you’re alive

(Source: andromeda4002019, via carpelibros)

brighteyescosplay:

geekygothgirl:

fatbodypolitics:

brigidkeely:

the-fly-agaric:

dragonsupremacy:

the-unpopular-opinions:

The opposite end of traditional “street harassment”: the girl who never gets cat called

In feminist spaces I see a lot of feminists complain about being street harassed. I read about it and I totally sympathize with their experiences, even though I have never experienced them myself. I am a female myself but am not conventionally attractive. I am not hideous but more or less a plain jane. On top of that I have ALWAYS valued comfort over style, so dressing feminine isn’t something I do on a regular basis. I wear a lot of loose jeans and T-shirts. But yeah, anyway, know that I am not trying to play “who has it harder” or anything but rather I am making this to share my experiences of getting the opposite end of the shit-covered stick that is street harassment that I don’t see being mentioned. I call it street dismissal.

When I say street dismissal I am talking about men who feel the need to subtly announce that unattractive women are not worthy of respect or acknowledgement because they are not a conventionally attractive female or their fellow man. 

Some examples I’ve personally experienced include:

  • Many guys at parties will arrive or leave, give all the men handshakes, give the attractive women hugs, but won’t even make eye contact with me. I am not a guy or a hot girl so I don’t exist.
  • I’ve been bumped into in public without an apology by men. I am not an attractive girl or your fellow man, so it makes sense for you to not even notice I am there.
  • One time I was walking behind a group of attractive women. A guy spotted us. Opened the door for the three women and shut the door in my face. I am not worthy of his time because I am not attractive.
  • I once was charged a cover on ladies night because I went out to the bar in my work uniform. (red shirt khaki pants)
  • Another time at a bar, I saw an open space to order a drink. The guy sitting next to me saw me, raised his eyebrows and turned the other way to make sure I don’t DARE try to talk to him. (Because I totally went there to hit on him and NOT get a drink right?)
  • I once went with my gay male friend to a straight guy’s house he knew. The first thing out of the straight guy’s mouth was “I was totally excited when you had a chick with you. Nevermind!” The whole night he offered my friend drinks and didn’t offer me a thing and seemed frustrated when I asked where the bathroom was. The only other thing he said that night was “Do you have any hot single friends that would come over here?”
  • Another time I went with a female friend of mine to get drinks. We met up with her guy friend. He ordered a round of beers for everyone except me. His excuse was “he didn’t know she was going to bring someone along and he is low on money” that was until his guy friend from high school showed up unexpectedly and he quickly bought him a drink.

These are just examples that have happened to me. So my question is are there any other “unattractive” girls out there that experience things similar to this? 

I just wanted to speak from the other perspective. We always hear the horror stories of sexism from the perspective of the women who are objectified by men in the sense of “oo I want that.” and not too many in the sense of “oo, ew DO NOT WANT.” 

This may seem like a big long rant that looks like “WAH PRETTY GIRLS GET THINGS AND I DON’T OH MY LIFE SUCKS” but I don’t mean to come off that way. Because I feel the need to mention that guys don’t do this just to get laid. This is where it’s important to bring up the fact that we are treated with less respect than other men. Men aren’t decent people to other men because they want to fuck them. They are decent to them because they see them as equals that deserve basic respect and acknowledgement. But we are women and to these men either you try to fuck them because they are hot or want them to go away. An unattractive woman has no purpose to him. 

Misogyny affects all women negatively. 

When I saw the first line I thought this post was going to be a boohooing tale about someone who desperately wanted to get harassed by men for hotness validation, but it was nothing of the sort. This is important and we should definitely see this brought up more in conversations regarding men’s general attitudes toward and interactions with women.

I hear stories like this mostly from big women or women who used to be a lot bigger than they are now. A woman told me she was once straight up punched in the face, after the guy told her she was disgusting and fat, and he just walked on and laughed. And the saddest part is that she told me, a lot of women harrassed her as well :(

OP is right, women are not left alone or “ignored” just because men dont find them attractive. And as the OP says, ignoring someone can be done in a rude and aggressive way.

And some people get both.

I’m a super fat women and I both get harassed/streetcalled/rubbed up on in public, but I also get completely ignored.

One time super late at night I was on the train and a complete stranger, a man, came up to me and started screaming at me and demanding money. I was reading a book and he got in my face and physically slapped it out of my hands and onto the floor, yelling and threatening me and demanding money and calling me names/insulting me. I loudly stated that I didn’t know him and asked him to leave me alone. Nobody in the train car reacted. The only other woman there stared stonily ahead (I don’t blame her at all). Finally, a tall guy stood up and walked toward me… to sit next to the (slender, conventionally attractive woman) putting his body between her and the screaming guy assaulting me. Nobody addressed the screaming man threatening me. Nobody pushed the brightly lit blue call button to notify the conductor. I didn’t matter. The other (thinner, more conventionally attractive) woman who was (not yet) in the line of fire mattered more than I did.

I wound up scrambling off the train just before the doors closed at the next stop, even though it wasn’t my stop and I knew there’d be a 20+ minute wait for the next train. I really hoped the guy wouldn’t be able to follow me out. Part of the reason I didn’t stay on until my stop (which was the next one after) was because I didn’t want him to disembark with me and follow me home… something that’s happened before.

There are a lot of different ways to harass women. Both responding aggressively to their femininity/perceived sexual availability and also denying it,  devaluing them because they aren’t feminine enough. Both are harmful. Both just… chip away at the person, at the soul, at the worth of someone. It’s a constant slow eroding drip wearing us down.

Yes to all this. I’ve been sexually harassed, fat shamed and invisible depending on how someone decides how valuable I am to them. It cuts at you.

I think I’ve already reblogged this but I don’t care. It’s so important. It’s SO important. In our society, you either exist as an object to be fucked or you’re ignored or greeted with anger if you’re not deemed fuckable enough. And it’s perverse and disgusting and I am so tired of hearing these stories from women. We are more. Whether we’re thin or fat, conventionally attractive or plain, no matter what color we are, we deserve respect and we aren’t getting it, (and many times WOC get it worse than white women, which I think it’s important to remember) and it makes me so tired and so sad.

This needs to be spread. The worst I’ve been harassed is also the most difficult to understand: I was not even a block away from my workplace walking at 8am in the frigid Midwest in a long, black puffy coat with black tights and boots and a man in a car driving opens his window to yell “NICE PUSSY.” I only caught the tail end so I pretended it didn’t happen until he purposefully made a u-turn to pass by me to scream it AGAIN. Thankfully he didn’t stop to continue but seriously, he couldn’t see anything (certainly not my vagina) and I was still nothing but an object. I’ve taken to wearing my headphones walking back and forth from work (no more than a few blocks). Harassment in all forms is degrading and makes one feel like their personal safety is compromised. Thank you everyone for sharing your stories

(via carpelibros)

Timestamp: 1406768769

books-cupcakes:

I forgot to tell you guys! Last night iprefertoread, bookphile and I were talking on facebook and we were discussing rude anons (::snorts:: if only I had known they would show up in my inbox the following day) and I meant to type “What assholes” but my phone corrected it to “What askholes” So now whenever we receive anon hate we are calling them askholes. I think it could catch on lol.

behindthebloom:

Today’s Mani Monday is the coolest manicure we’ve ever seen. Yes- that’s Celaena from the US cover of THRONE OF GLASS in nail art

(via gatsbook)

Timestamp: 1406768311

Anonymous:
What stereotypes/tropes of female characters would you like to see broken in the YA genre?

thewritingcafe:

1) The extremely ordinary girl who is average, plain, and bland in appearance, personality, and general character development and who constantly talks about how boring she is and how there’s nothing special about her. This character is boring. This character is flat and static. The plot throws her around and everyone else figures things out for her. What she does do is make one or two very asinine decisions. Authors often use that as an opportunity to let a male love interest step in and fix everything for her. She then moves on from the mistake without having learned or without having changed from the experience.

Your characters, especially your protagonists and main characters, deserve so much more than that.

I should say that characters who genuinely believe there is nothing special about them do not fall into this. The characters who don’t genuinely believe it are the ones who mention it in a nonchalant way when they’re confused as to why someone would like them romantically and who then never mention it again. This belief is not shown in their dialogue, their emotions, or their behavior. They never express their concerns and no one else notices that they have low self esteem.

2) Female characters who are tokens. They’re introduced as the Strong Female Character, or what authors think a strong female character is, and do nothing but nag to show that women are always right and men are always wrong. They contribute nothing to the plot, are not well written, and rarely have relationships with other female characters.

3) The evil ex girlfriend needs to go or at least get an upgrade. She often shows up with the first character I described. She’s the ex girlfriend of the hot guy who is in love with the super average girl and she’s often the opposite of the protagonist. The protagonist is kind, gentle, innocent, and pure. The evil ex girlfriend is rude, dresses provocatively, hates the protagonist, and is an antagonist. This author gives all traits they consider immoral to this character and they’re used as a tool for preaching.

There are a lot of things wrong with this character, including sexism, blatant “white and black” morality, the “virgin vs whore” symbolism, and general craft failure. I think the only well written version of this character I’ve seen is Regina George (prior to Janis’s plans to mess with her).

Another version of this character is the “crazy ex” who stalks the male love interest and who is often referred to as being insane or mentally ill. These characters are less common in the YA age group though.

4) Female characters who are only love interests. These characters can be taken out of the story without losing anything important to the plot or characterization. This is craft failure.

5) We need to stop “fridging” female characters. This is when a female character is killed off by the bad guys for the purpose of angering the male protagonist. The death most often happens in the beginning of the story or shortly before the story begins. This trope is used way too often.

6) Female characters who are used to show that femininity or being attractive is inherently bad and that it makes other characters like that bad people. These characters often complain about other female characters and prefer to hang with the boys because they’re “not complicated” or something.

7) This next character isn’t one that we need to get rid of, but one that needs to allow others to take the role of the protagonist. I see so many times in fiction, particularly in speculative fiction, that female protagonists need some unique skill or ability to be the protagonist. Male characters get to be the unlikely hero who comes from humble beginnings just as much as they get to be someone with a unique ability. Female characters don’t get that chance too often.

raise your hand if you’ve got the sweetest followers and you appreciate each and every one

(Source: black-quadrant, via bookishwave)

"My response to the ‘I am not a feminist’ internet phenomenon….

First of all, it’s clear you don’t know what feminism is. But I’m not going to explain it to you. You can google it. To quote an old friend, “I’m not the feminist babysitter.”

But here is what I think you should know.

You’re insulting every woman who was forcibly restrained in a jail cell with a feeding tube down her throat for your right to vote, less than 100 years ago.

You’re degrading every woman who has accessed a rape crisis center, which wouldn’t exist without the feminist movement.

You’re undermining every woman who fought to make marital rape a crime (it was legal until 1993).

You’re spitting on the legacy of every woman who fought for women to be allowed to own property (1848). For the abolition of slavery and the rise of the labor union. For the right to divorce. For women to be allowed to have access to birth control (Comstock laws). For middle and upper class women to be allowed to work outside the home (poor women have always worked outside the home). To make domestic violence a crime in the US (it is very much legal in many parts of the world). To make workplace sexual harassment a crime.

In short, you know not what you speak of. You reap the rewards of these women’s sacrifices every day of your life. When you grin with your cutsey sign about how you’re not a feminist, you ignorantly spit on the sacred struggle of the past 200 years. You bite the hand that has fed you freedom, safety, and a voice.

In short, kiss my ass, you ignorant little jerks.

"

Libby Anne (via dillondean)

(Source: dumbledoresarmy-againstbigotry, via bookmad)

Sophie Turner & Maisie Williams at the Entertainment Weekly Comic Con Party Photobooth.

(Source: direwolvesz, via literarywasted)

Timestamp: 1406767597

thebooker:

As promised, here is my feels-themed giveaway! The books/series above all have one thing in common - they made me feel something. That doesn’t necessarily mean I cried but they definitely inspired some kind of emotional response in my robot-like self. They’re also some of my favourite books. Hopefully there’s a decent enough selection for you to choose from.

5 people will be sent a book of their choice from the selection above if they’re randomly selected as winners.

Please read the following:

  • To enter, like and/or reblog this post
  • You may reblog the post as many times as you like but don’t annoy your followers too much with it
  • I would prefer if you were following me, since this giveaway is a ‘thank you’ to my followers
  • This giveaway is international, as I am purchasing books via Book Depository and they have free delivery for the majority of the world. Double check that your country is included here
  • Your inbox MUST be open. I won’t be contacting anyone via fan mail
  • Winners may also choose a sequel to the books pictured above if it’s part of a series
  • Winners may choose which edition of the book they want, so long as it is paperback and under $15 (AU). The only exception is The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry, which is over $20 and hardback. I’ll only be buying this for one person (if they want it) so I have enough for the other books, sorry! I just love it so much and want to be able to share it with at least one person, even if it’s expensive
  • One of the books, Alexander Altmann A01567 is only available as a prize for Australians, as it is unavailable on Book Depository. If Aussies would like this book, I will order it for you from Bookworld
  • If you’re not sure which book you’d like, I’d be happy to tell you more about them and help you pick one that suits your tastes
  • No giveaway blogs
  • If you’re uncomfortable giving me your address, don’t be. I won’t be saving it or giving it out elsewhere or anything
  • The giveaway ends August 1st 12PM AEST
  • Winners will be selected using a random number generator and have 48 hours to get back to me. I’m quite lenient on that but I would prefer if people replied ASAP so I can be organised
  • If you have any other questions, feel free to ask me

Good luck and happy reading, word shakers!

(via books-and-cookies)

Timestamp: 1406767589

sabistuki:

STOP. This is the police, you’re under arrest for being too cute. Now, put your hands where I can hold them.

(Source: sobbinqmoved, via adventuresonpaper)

Anonymous:
Thank you

No problem :)